Pomp and Circumstance

Last month I graduated from college. About every person I've met in my entire life has asked me what I'm going to do now. Of course most people are well-meaning, but you should avoid asking such questions unless you intend to offer some valuable, life-changing insight or suggestion. Fortunately, some of my friends and family members have suggested a few fitting career options. They've also been kind enough to suggest how I should pursue a career.

-Recluse writer- To be a recluse writer you'd have to marry a mountainman who could build you a cabin and shoot bears (for the bearskin rug). So I'd have to make apple pies and egg nog to feed my mountainman husband, but then I could use the rest of my time to write books.

-IRA arms smuggler- Unfortunately, I'm not Irish, but one of my Irish friend's has family connections and I have a political science degree.

-Pirate captain- recruit wenchmen from the harbors of the Great Salt Lake.

-Vice-President of the United States/World- the future president of the World has already picked me to be vice-president. Just have to wait a few years.

-Rock star- play bass in my older brother's band.